Ask friends if they have an extra set of crutches and everybody has one, if not two. Crutches, sock jockeys, foot-long shoe horns and portable toilets. It’s almost funny and if it isn’t, it probably should be.
Herbie got a cat. This wasn’t an automatic, and the choice was between a three-legged cat and one with the traditional number of limbs.
I’m signing up for Medicare. It’s hard to believe. Someone so young and who looks as good as I do signing up for old people’s insurance. This is akin to Bruce Springsteen making the cover of AARP Magazine.
Sometimes driving is as satisfying as a peppermint stick ice cream cone from Dewar’s. In “American Graffiti,” one of two must-see movies if you want to understand Bakersfield and the San Joaquin Valley (the other being “Best of Times”), the characters cruise and while they do, they observe, …
I hit the royal wall when I uncovered a purple tea tin commemorating “The Marriage of Prince William of Wales & Miss Catherine Middleton 29th April 2011.”
Suddenly, everybody is going to the dump. It’s in the air, water and trucks, which are starting up themselves and honking their horns for their owners to get in.
I don’t want his job. Not writing poetry on demand. Writing poetry is hard enough but deadline poetry makes my head spin, burn and hurt.
Notre Dame is the daily intelligence test for the newly arrived in Paris. Notre Dame and the Eiffel Tower. No matter how lost you get or how poor your sense of direction, locate either one and you’re probably not going to die of starvation or be eaten by the Parisian wolves.
Easter is a time of renewal, joy and love or at least I thought so until Sue and I got into it over a pound of jelly beans I’d bought from Smart & Final. I’d put them in a bowl and when I came home one afternoon she had removed the black ones and the white ones from the mix.
I finally jumped into "Game of Thrones," or GoT as the insiders call it. Too many people have said things like “This is the best show of all time,” with the subtext being "If you don’t watch this, you’re nuts."
Our neighbors moved out next door. Their house is dark. A dark, empty house has a different feel than a dark, full house. It’s darker, emptier and more prone to be the subject of darker and emptier thoughts if one was prone to having such thoughts, which one is not.
I was buying some heavy cream at Trader’s Joe’s when I saw somebody I knew. I smiled and asked him how he was doing. He hesitated, as a deer might before crossing a road on a dark night.
A couple of mornings ago, I had a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios but that’s not breakfast, that’s a breakfast placeholder, so I backed it up with two pieces of Sonora wheat sourdough from Baker’s Outpost, a local bakery owned by Laura and Ian Journey.
After watching Roger Federer glide around the court in the finals of Indian Wells last Sunday I realized we had a lot in common, starting with we both continue to defy expectations. Although he lost to the gifted young Austrian Dominic Thiem in three sets, the 37-year-old Federer does what h…
Not much sun, lots of rain and we’re still blooming blooming. It’s hard to imagine what this place is going to look like with a couple of weeks of sun but if the early weeds in the cracks of the sidewalk and in the garden — front and back — are indications, this spring will be an explosion o…
Pay month and date no mind. March 20 or not (spring’s official start), we’re here. We’ve arrived. We’re good but good promises to get better.
A universal sign would be nice. Something like “Don’t panic, bathroom nearby.” In this case, raise one finger if I have something on my face, two if I’m clean as a freshly wiped countertop.
I’m a pro, OK. I helped raise four kids. I can take care of one 2½-year-old grandchild — a small fry — for a day. It’s not that hard and I don’t get why our children and their spouses are exhausted all of the time.
At a friend’s house for dinner, I noticed that the toilet would not flush. The handle was disengaged. Houston had lost touch with Apollo 13 and there would be no splashdown regardless of how energetically I jiggered.
It’s easy to ignore the desert but unwise to do so in the late winter and early spring when it can surprise and delight, and scatter seeds that may burst into bloom over the unfolding years.
Nora, our 2½-year-old granddaughter, came over. I thought we’d had fun. We had, but grandparents and parents are gateway fun. The glittering rides lie ahead.
Last week the showers at the pool were closed for maintenance. The “pool” is the McMurtrey Aquatics Center. Without a shower, because of the chlorination (sodium hypochlorite), swimmers risk looking as if they have brushed their faces against a salt lick.
I don’t know why I feel sorry for somebody when I see them walking over the Oak Street overpass, but I do. I wonder, how did they get there, where will they go next and what will they do when they arrive?